More physical therapy today. I asked my boss about home cervical traction because it's going to be two weeks until my next appointment (their schedule is full before the holiday and they're taking some extra time off, so two weeks until I get my neck stretched again). He told me to find out how many pounds they've been using on me at PT (it's fifteen). Home units are twenty dollars for an over-the-door unit, fifty for an inflatable one, or four hundred for a lying-down one on Amazon. Pro models are in the thousands.. I don't care about uncomfortable, I want it to do what it's supposed to do. I can take uncomfortable for a long-ass while, as my history demonstrates. I also did more strengthening exercises, and they ramped up the weight a little bit. I am totally ok with pulling things down or lifting up, that was easy at twenty pounds, but side to side (adductions?) and forward-back (rowing motion) are still so freaking hard at ten pounds, that I had to do them shakily in batches of two or three. Even my supposedly-strong side is only a tiny bit stronger than my injured one: that arm does four before needing to rest. This time I was better prepared, though. I took ibuprofen immediately after leaving (purse of holding for the win), and when I got home I iced both arms immediately. Hopefully I won't be in nearly as much pain as I was in last time, but time will tell.
One odd side effect of moving away from town is that now I'm on time (or early) far more often. I know that it takes longer for me to get to work, so I spend a lot fewer mornings hiding in bed because I don't wanna go. I mean, I still don't want to go, but I can't just get there ten minutes after rolling out of bed anymore But now, I'm there alone for a while, usually for a good half hour, before anyone else gets there. So I get to crank some tunes. A couple of years ago D wanted to get rid of his old desktop's computer speakers, and I'd been wanting some for my work computer, so they're now hooked up under my desk, subwoofer and all. The volume knob is almost all the way down and I keep the sound levels low on my computer most of the time, but for alone time, there is some volume. So I'll search for whatever is going through my head on YouTube and crank it up for a few minutes while I'm doing prep for the day.
A lot of days it's my pump-it-up song "Battleflag" by Lo-Fidelity Allstars. Some days it's a hunt for whatever interstitial music NPR was playing that morning. Last week there was a bit more variety. Wednesday was soul music, starting with "For the Love of Money" by the O'Jays and clicking around in the suggestions. Thursday, was a departure for me. I had a deep need for some punk rock, starting with The Clash's "Brand New Cadillac" and eventually rolling around to my favorite version of "You Oughta Know" by 1000 Mona Lisas, a band I've never heard of outside of a sampler one of my college roommates had. This one is sung by a guy and I imagine the you who oughta know is a bi guy who left the singer for a potential babymama, and boy is he pissed. I still like the original, but it just isn't angry enough for me.
I bop along to the music, not dancing (because a: I suck at it and b: neck problems [aka "No More Headbanging, Ever"]), but bobbing along. And maybe I'll mouth the lyrics, but I don't sing them out loud. I seem to have lost my singing voice. "Too depressed to go to karaoke anymore" means no weekly practice and now I sound like shit. (This is not the first time depression robbed someone of their voice. Not the last, either.) Now that I have a commute, I should be able to practice some in the car, but I'm usually listening to NPR, so I forget. And my car stereo is lacking in any input interface (it's the stock am/fm radio), so no singing along to my own stuff that I know and could practice with. The Bobs acapella stuff is really good for tuning up, but there's no way to play it in the car. Perhaps I should invest in a new radio transmitter; the older one died a horrible heat death, and its nifty-but-super-cheap replacement has an annoying buzz from a short somewhere on the circuit board.
Still having trouble getting motivated and taking the easy way out by not delving too deeply into the many bags of clothing still piled in the bedroom. I did a shallow pass over a few things and pulled out three items, though.
First was some temporary hair color, a maroon red hue that really hasn't been stylish since the 90's. I know I bought the box in this decade though. Go-Away box.
Second was a black women's xl t-shirt, with a small Triforce logo over the boobs. I can stuff myself into it, but wearing it always makes me feel like I'm pretending to be something I'm not (cooler, maybe). I've never played a Zelda game. I think I've only handled a non-Wii Nintendo device twice in my life (and Wii stuff a few more times than that), but no Zelda ever. Go-Away Box.
Last was a black plastic container that used to have honey butter in it. I think it was from Bon Temps, when they were in their old location, and it's been years. After being emptied, it floated around on top of the toaster oven (that we gave to Goodwill at the time of moving). Sometimes I would put small amounts of ingredients in it while making recipes (even though I have many much better containers made specifically for this purpose). Recycle bin.