Still caffeinated today.  Up too late last night after yesterday's caffeination and DOING ALL THE THINGS.  This morning I woke up sore all over and dog tired.  But I still had to go to work.  And be nice.  And talk to people.  I swallowed a handful of ibuprofen and a mouthful of diet soda at the start of the workday this morning.  Made it through the awful schedule of [aw]fullness while literally running up and down the hallway and around the open end of my desk.  I used a tracking app on an iDevice last year to see how far I walked in a day, and I'd walked five miles by noon.  And people think I have a sedentary job.  Well, sometimes it is, when we don't have patients in the afternoons. But the mornings can be hell on wheels.  If I was at all graceful it would be awesome to do this job on skates, but as I cannot skate to save my life it's not to be. Plus, who wants to skate on carpet?  (Well, it would be softer when I'd fall on my ass, but that's only wishful thinking.) Tonight I vow I will get some fucking sleep.  I have a hard enough time turning my brain off when I'm not caffeinated, and on it is like like fighting a level boss.  Brain, why won't you stay down?

Day 20:

I came home and immediately went into "Find the thing(s)" mode, but yesterday was too much, so I only emptied one bag.  Well, technically two bags, but I didn't get rid of anything that was in the mesh bag full of petticoats.  You'll pry that organza from my cold, dead fingers.

Five things today.  A blue and grey Gap tank top, slightly too small, and the elastic in the straps is crackly.  Second was a short sleeved purple sweater, too large.  I folded it up and put it in the dresser, but not five minutes later I pulled out a nearly identical one that fit much better.  How many purple sweaters does one person need, anyway?  The big one had to go.  Yet another Polycon shirt went straight into go-away.  

The last item I'm very sad to give up.  It's a vintage (like vintage vintage) nightgown that came from a clothing exchange, of course.  It seriously looks like some of the lingerie-as-outerwear evening gowns from the 90's. It's bias cut, full length, has a lovely gathered bust and embroidery along the neckline.  And it was always slightly too small (even when I was at my smallest).  I grabbed it for a costume that never came together, and I want to keep it for a sewing reference, but it's not going to happen.  I bought one of the few Vogue patterns that I own (because Vogue patterns make grown seamstresses cry) that's a close match to the design, but my making something is never going to be as well made as this vintage one.  Sigh.  And it used to be white.  I still kick myself every time I see it, because when I first got it it was white and now it's not.  I washed it with a brown skirt that wasn't color-fast and it's off-white, eggshell, whatever, just not white.  Not the way it's supposed to be.  I mean, it looks ok in ivory, but I'll always remember that it used to be white, and it's like a pebble in my shoe: irritating.  It's probably best to get rid of it.  Nobody else will ever know that it used to be white and it wouldn't bother them like it does me.

Ok, so caffeinated, must tell the brain meats to go on standby for a while.  Spock out.
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Cyrano de Univac

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